Seen on Social Media: a woman is complaining that time is money. She claims she does not have time for coffee dates, or walks in the park. She states she is an entrepreneur, she has kids. She wants dinner at the least.
Counter point, from someone I know, who is in the dating arena:
Some people are GREAT over text, and in person they have no personality.
Some people are awful over text and GREAT in person.
You have no real idea if you want to spend time with them, in person, until you're actually in person with them.
Hence... I do a basic inexpensive "vibe check" meetup. Could be coffee. Could be a walk at a park. Something where it's only a 30 min time commitment on my part, and only a max of $8 monetary commitment.
If they've catfished me (only used pics on their profile 50+ pounds ago), no big loss. If their personality in person sucks, no big loss. If for whatever reason I'm not interested, no big loss.
I'm not planning a 2-3 hour date that'll run $100-200, with someone I haven't met. That's throwing away time and money.
At least 80% of the time out of all the couple hundred first dates I've had... probably closer to 90% or more of the time... I'm not interested in seeing the person again. So why would I blow $100-200 each of those times? Why would I set up 90 mins - 3 hours of time to go spend time with someone and gamble with my time and money?
I call it "vibe check"...
I mean:
- can they hold a conversation?
- is there any physical attraction?
If it's a "no" to either of those criteria, I'm not interested in seeing them again.
He has a point. Thoughts?
Your friend is on the money. Online dating is terrific at buying exposure to women I’d never have met otherwise. It’s godawful at assessing chemistry or lack thereof. Pics that were 30-40lbs ago is indeed a thing on occasion. So yes, a quick chemistry check, with a follow up of either “I didn’t find the connection I’m looking for, good luck!” or “Hi, I really enjoyed yesterday afternoon and I’d like to see you again.” is a solid approach in my personal experience.
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