Things The Rifleman Cannot Do

Whoosh!!!
The sound you heard and the breeze you felt upon your skin was the Rifleman striking out.  The Rifleman didn't even come close.  What, you ask, can the Rifleman not do? Here are 16 things!

From the  Return of Kings article, "16 SIGNS THAT YOU ARE A WEAK BETA MALE."

1. You bench-press less than your body weight.
The Rifleman benches 300 for reps, and weights 220.

2. You have more than 25% body fat.
Nope.  Mid teens.  And yes, the Rifleman could stand to get that down a bit. 

3. You lack the will or ability to learn self-defense.
The Rifleman teaches self defense. 

4. You embrace leftist ideologies.
Heh.

5. Your existence largely centers around pastimes like sport, video games, or TV shows.
Never has. 

6. You are more interested in other people than ideas.
Several ideas on tap at the moment.  One of then will come to fruition here in the next few days.

7. When you travel, you never step out of your comfort zone.
LOL. That's the whole reason to travel. And The Rifleman travels weekly.

8. You often watch porn.
Gun porn does not count.

9. You’re letting your girlfriend make all the major decisions in your relationship.
Heh.

10. You worship females and celebrities.
Nope. 

11. You blame society rather than making individual improvements in your own life.
The only thing Society does for The Rifleman is to take taxes from him. Therefore, The Rifleman makes more money to make up for it.

12. You cannot stand “hate facts."
The Rifleman is a purveyor of such facts.

13. You’re taking care of someone else’s kid.
Not even one. The Rifleman's kids do, though. It's called babysitting.

14.   You’re in a relationship with single mom.
Not even close. The Rifleman is married to a married mom. The Rifleman is the one who made her a mom.

15. You have many female friends.
Just a few. Most are friends of the wife, or moms of the kids' friends.

16. You constantly defend females.
If you believe this, you have never read this blog.