Pitfalls of attachment parenting

If you've read this blog for any length of time, you know that I do not subscribe to the myth of attachment parenting. In fact, I denounce it as one of many manifestations with what's wrong with our country today.

Marxism
At the heart of the matter is the principle of self-sufficiency. It used to be that the goal of being a parent was to raise a human being capable of self-sufficiency. Attachment parenting takes that all away and, according to this author with whom I agree, replaces it with a goal of creating another co-dependent automaton for the socialist agenda. Understanding the basic idea, of course, that socialism is one of the economic platforms needed to promote Marxism, communism being the alternative.

So I read that author's piece several times, and I challenged myself to prove or disprove Attachment Parenting (AP) as a Marxist agenda.  Boy, was it a light-bulb moment!

Remember the mantra of Marxism is "from each according to his ability, to each according to his need."
That mantra will be repeated herein.

Also remember the classic downfall of Marxism - a failure to promote the part about "according to his ability." The assumption is that there will be plenty of motivated and capable people who will go along with it.

Please note
All throughout, you will see a lack of linking to any attachment parenting website. Though this is not typically how I do it, if you do a Google search, you will find a site or two pretty quickly with their official positions, and you can see I am not simply making their claims up. 

Audience
This is most important. The target audience of the AP types are people who seek unhealthy amounts of attention, or who seek attention in unhealthy manners.

Packaging
Oh, they package it nice enough, to be sure. In their "8 Principles of Parenting" they throw in a few feel-good, known practices that are helpful for rearing infants. Problem is, they mix in subterfuge, deceit, and outright lies with it in an effort to push forward with what I think is their agenda. They also push infant raising techniques into the realm of toddler and child raising techniques.

Again, the idea is dependence by the child, and helping the mom gain the odd attention she seeks.

Prepare for Pregnancy, Birth, and Parenting
To prepare is actually really good advice. But it is also where the AP starts interweaving socialist and Marxist viewpoints in with the legitimate advice. For example, encouragement to "discuss concerns before they become crises," is a clear attempt at socialism - which strives to have the individual require the assistance of the collective.

If the socialists and Marxists can get people to think their everyday problems are bigger than they really are, then the next steps can include seeking help, possible medication, and even hospitalization. Extreme needs, but an attention-seeking person will surely take what they can get.

Feed with Love and Respect
Sounds innocent enough. And in fact, the majority of the tips and topics here are perfectly fine for a nursing infant. But here is where the real subterfuge comes in to play. This is where they introduce and start to promote the weirdo concept of breastfeeding children far beyond the age of 2.

Mind you, there is no particular age past which a child must be weaned, but having a teenager whipping his mom's boob our for a swig is generally considered socially unacceptable. Of course, the AP types will ridicule my statement here, saying "the child will wean when he is ready."

And that's the real problem: children do not know what they need, nor in many instances what they really want. Children rely on adults to teach them how to be self sufficient. AP teaches the child to remain dependent on mommy for milk far beyond societal norms.

Also, the AP types will quote how breast-feeding is done until later ages (age 3 and beyond) in many other countries. They conveniently ignore the part that these are all 3rd world countries where obtaining food is difficult, and people are forced to do unusual things to simply survive. We live in the wealthiest planet on Earth, we do not need to imitate primitive society.

But the Marxists want to do away with capitalism, so they need to make us think that way is the right way.

The AP types will also quote how healthy is is for a child to continue breastfeeding to advanced ages, especially with regards to immunity-building. Fact is, immunity advantages from breastfeeding are gained between age 12 months and age 2 years. The AP types simply ignore that fact, and quote general anecdotes about how it must be good to keep going. No proof required.

In the end, this is one point that serves two functions:

It allows the attention-seeker to gain attention.
It allows for the furthering of the Marxist mentality - creating NEED where there is none.

Respond with Sensitivity
Here is where AP just jumps off the deep end. As usual, it starts innocently enough, but before long, one read advice to not discipline a toddler throwing a temper tantrum. Of course, AP advises never to spank to use harsh words. They talk about a child's inability to handle strong emotion, and inability to understand complex thoughts. True enough, but then they turn these into sheer horse-hockey.

This gem and many like it can be easily found in AP circles: "A parent's role in tantrums is to comfort the child, not to get angry or punish her." While I agree that a parent is wasting energy getting angry with a tantrum-throwing toddler, the fact is that the toddler is trying to learn how to cope with the world. If you teach her that throwing a tantrum is how she needs to act to get her way, then you are doing that child an immense disservice. That's child-abuse in my book.

Then you get a gem like this: "Symptoms of burnout or inability to cope with baby's needs are signals that extra support and/or professional help are necessary." Again, trying to create unwarranted need.

Remember the flip side: children crave to know a) their boundaries and b) how to handle life appropriately. Teach them those things, and you are doing more than AP will ever allow you to do.

Use Nurturing Touch
Again, we start off with an honest principle (that's how all effective lies start). What you see underneath is more of the same BS geared toward letting the child lead the way (a guaranteed way to raise a co-dependent child), as well as more strategies for long-term breastfeeding and lack of proper discipline.

Ensure Safe Sleep
Here is where the AP folks jump off the high dive into an empty pool again. You are introduced to the term "co-sleeping." And get this: not only are arguments used to promote the concept, but...

they actually claim that SIDS is caused by failure to co-sleep!

Holy shneikies!

I guess 300 million grown Americans who didn't co-sleep isn't proof enough. And I guess they have never actually had a kid sleep in their bed... cause we all know this is what it really looks like.

Also introduced is the weirdo notion that the child will let you know when she is tired enough to actually go to sleep... as opposed to a routine bed time. HOGWASH!!!

Again, the attempt is to raise automatons who need instead of self-sustaining, thinking young men and women.

Provide Consistent and Loving Care
More Marxism magic. Some gems you might see that are geared toward creating a needy child:

- Instead of trying to fit baby into pre-baby schedule, rearrange everything else so that the child's lead can be followed.
Yeah, because a baby knows how to make decisions based on logic, and caring for the others in the family.

- Respect the child's lead on separation.
Because children are born knowing how to do this? Gimme a break!

- Accept that even older children have occasional difficulty with separation.
Yeah, and they need to learn how to deal with it like the other 6 billion people on the planet do.

Practice Positive Discipline
This includes a section called "the dangers of traditional discipline" - because we all know something that has worked for thousands of years has got to be faulty.

The general advice given is to avoid having boundaries or punishments, because those can be so effective "harmful." Instead, they want you to reason with 2-year-olds, and take the lead of a six-year-old. Children raised like this will certainly not be able to cope in society, and are guaranteed a life of need.

Strive for Balance in your Personal Life
After the manure of Marxism has been shoveled down your throat, they wrap up with the sound principles we all know to be true... albeit with their little twists on them all.

Why don't they just say: Well done, comrade. You have now created a perfect candidate for the welfare rolls. Three hardworking taxpayers will be forced to pay for the life of your crotchfruit, so you have successfully enslaved four persons though your noble efforts.

(Yes, I know that is a bit of a play on communism and there is a difference, albeit slight, between communism and Marxism. However, until someone can 1. explain the difference and 2. give me an equally sarcastic ending, I will stick with this one.

Post edit: Seems Alanis Morissette has opened up to be an attachment parent. Need any more proof that they are out there simply to get attention?


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